Picky Eater Denying to EatChildren who are picky eaters are very reluctant to try new things and tend to limit themselves to a few favorite foods.This can be difficult for the parent or caregiver who is trying to provide a variety of nutritional meals. Here are some strategies to help you deal with a choosy child. These are not “quick fixes,” but ideas to help you slowly change the picky eater’s eating habits!

  1. Plan to cook family meals, not two or three different meals at a time, so that each member of your family has a dinner they like. Cooking family meals reinforces 3 things:
    • You are a family and families do things together, i.e., eating the same meal. This does not mean everyone has to eat their meal at the same time every night, especially when you have to consider everyone’s work/activity schedules, but this does mean that everyone eats the same meal.
    • It reinforces the expectation that everyone will eat what is prepared (e.g., there is no back-up option). This is a great lesson to teach children before they start eating meals at their friends’ homes.
    • It shows other family members the picky eater is not getting something that may be viewed as “special” or “different.” Caregivers unknowingly encourage this by becoming a “short order” cook.
  2. When you cook family meals, make sure there is one aspect that will appeal to everyone in the family (like rice, vegetables, or fruit), OR a meal that is universally appealing (like spaghetti and meatballs, or grilled cheese and soup). One great way to ensure everybody will like what is planned, is a family meal to make-your own pizza, pita pockets, or hard/soft tacos. The vegetarian can choose the non-meat options, or the picky eater child who doesn’t like many veggies can choose tomatoes and cheese for their toppings/fillings.
  3. Let each child choose the family meal once in a while, even if it’s scrambled eggs and pancakes. He will feel like his opinion matters.
  4. Consistently put a new or disliked food on your picky eater’s plate at least once a day (such as one red pepper strip or a small piece of fish). This sets the expectation that what is being served should be eaten. You might even give the child a choice between which new food he can try. It might take months of continuous offering before the child even takes a bite, and that’s ok!
  5. Avoid calling too much attention to what the picky eater is (or is not) eating at mealtimes. Don’t ignore the situation, but rather ask about his day or discuss what he’ll be doing tomorrow. Make a huge attempt to avoid arguments about food or pleading him to eat “at least one bite.” Focus on keeping mealtime fun and relaxed. It is important that children positively associate with food and family, and that the picky eater feel he is in control of what he eats.

Remember, this is not a quick fix!  Keep the environment positive. Commit to some of these suggestions and watch changes over time – your child will be proud of his choices. And you will likely notice your picky eater enjoying the mealtime atmosphere!

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