We’ve all been there: You spend a great deal of time, money, and mental energy striving for a healthy diet for your family, only to have the other people in your child’s life turn it upside down.
Here are some tips for keeping your child’s healthy eating on track with other caregivers:
Problem #1: Nobody seems to care about healthy eating as much as I do
Solution: They may just not know much about eating healthy and are afraid to ask. Exchange lists can be helpful in assisting babysitters or grandparents build a healthy meal for kids. This can be a great way to keep your child’s eating consistent regardless of who’s taking care of them.
Problem #2: My parents/in-laws follow different eating rules than I do
Solution: Gone are the days when children were told to finish everything on their plate, or dessert was used as a bribe to finish the main course. Your child’s grandparents probably still play by these rules. It’s likely how they were raised, and they are worried about food waste.
You need to nicely explain that things are different now. We are facing an obesity epidemic and parents (like you!) have to work hard to teach healthy habits to promote a healthy weight. Explain that it’s important that your child recognize when he’s full and stop eating even if there’s food left over. Tell them it’s fine to offer a small dessert, but not as a reward for eating “healthy” foods. If grandparents are worried the child will be hungry later, reinforce that you will offer a bedtime snack.
Problem #3: My parents/in-laws want to spoil my kids with junk food
Solution: This is normal! Many grandparents struggle with being the “babysitter” and also being “Grandma”. It’s important they see that you understand that! Emphasize that you want them to provide treats to their grandkids, but not as an everyday thing. Their grandchild will be more excited when a treat from Grandpa is “special” and less frequent.
Set limits: “I’d love Maddie to have just one treat when she’s with you on Fridays.” Or come up with a list of “treat” foods that your child can look forward to at Grandpa’s house: raisins, pretzels, special cereal, pistachios (many kids love taking them out of the shell). Let grandparents in on the secret that most kids get really excited about fruit like strawberries, raspberries, and watermelon! Grandparents can make a yogurt dip to go with it if they want to make it more fun.
Problem #4: My babysitter thinks chips and a coke are an appropriate snack
Solution: Nobody wants to be the food police, and it can be awkward to tell a babysitter that her food choices are not what you would feed your own child. Stay away from accusations.
Instead, say something like “I’m trying to get the kids to eat more fruits and veggies. Would you mind helping and making sure they get at least one fruit or one vegetable at every meal and snack?” This will be a lot easier if you keep fruit readily available and veggies cut-up and pre-portioned in the fridge. The exchange lists can also be super helpful to show the babysitter what a balanced meal or snack looks like.
Problem #5: My ex is treating our kids to unhealthy restaurant meals and I feel like the bad guy
Solution: Stick to your guns. Your bottom line is that you want your kids to grow up having a healthy relationship with food. Part of that is understanding that all foods can fit – including junk food.
Instead of feeling guilty about being a stickler for health food, make your meals fun! Have the kids help you make pizza with kid-friendly toppings like pineapple and cherry tomatoes. Establish a routine of having family taco night so your kids can choose from lettuce, avocado, black beans, tomatoes, and cheese. Let your kids measure and mix while you make whole grain banana muffins together. Your time with them will be enjoyable (you won’t feel like the “bad guy”) and they will learn what it means to enjoy preparing and eating healthy meals.
Remember, sometimes it’s okay to let go and know that your kids will enjoy a treat with other people – and with you as well! It can still be part of a healthy lifestyle.
Have you encountered any of these problems? Please share in the comments how you were able to deal with them without hurting anybody’s feelings!